Monday, February 16, 2009

The mailwoman bringeth heaven.... and garden porn..

Oh I have made some WONDERFUL friends here. Friends that send things like this for a weary soul...
Male (nuts) and Female (no nuts) those are her words - just so that I got exactly what I like -sending someone chocolate is the sign of a TRUE FRIEND - so the rest of you get busy if you want to be my friend... *double snort* just kidding - your all my friends, so send chocolate anyway... am I funny ? -NO - didnt think so, please forgive me by sending chocolate... LOL


Then this same wonderful friend sent my spawn these....

No its not a bag of green goobers, or spinich, or anything like that - THIS is what she sent..


Gummy GI Joes!!!! FREAKIN COOL!! were Big Sons exact words...... What a woman to think of feeding the kids so that I dont have to share my chocolate - that was why you sent them right Tina? Because this is all about me right? What do you mean its because you like my kids - man you dont KNOW my kids!!! *double snort* But seriously - THANK YOU to my dear friend Willow Witch - this is where I would put your link if I could EVER get that to work for me - The boys LOVED them and I know this because I found Big Son at the sink with this...


A 'soldier down' - it hit the floor and he was NOT about to let it go to waste, so it was going to the 'medic' - See the dirt on there? This is proof that my house is SO clean that you can eat off of the floor at any time of day - providing that you wash it first.... just so you dont all think we are TOTAL SLOBS - he did drop it under the table where Milk Man had just gotten up from, with his dirty shoes on. Does that make you feel better? Nah, me neither...

The best part of this little package - ok not the best but the funniest was this little gem... put your coffee down and DO NOT HAVE FLUID IN YOUR MOUTH....



Dont blame me if your computer screen is full of liquid - you were warned.... The inside says "just a little card to crack you up"!!! I seriously thought I was going into cardiac arrest. I laughed until I thought my guts would never be the same. Big Sons comment - "Whats so funny about someone haveing a flip-flop stuck up thier butts" Then I laughed harder, not believing that I could laugh harder than I had.... he had no clue that we used to call them thongs - so I had to explain the whole 'thong' thing including the horrid bathing 'strings' women wear... Needless to say, he was not impressed... but I sure was!! LOL So thank you again my dear friend. I got this gift of Friday and it was right when I needed it the most. Big Son issues, Lispy having broncitis, Milk Dud just getting over strep now has broncitis also and Big Son just got done with his meds for strep - we have NEVER had a winter that we have all been so sick. I want spring NOW!!!

Now onto the garden porn.... I know that you are all waiting with baited breath for this.....








This is the holy grail of gardening - even though I dont buy from them because they are expensive.... but they have the best catalog..





I find myslef carressing the pages, dreaming of a midsummer trist in the warm dirt...








and FREE are words of pure rapture!!!


Please make your young children leave the room before you look at these next photos. NO young eyes should see these things..









Dont you LOVE pictures like that? And then the centerfold...

The beloved order form - dare I speak the words..








Why does this picture make me laugh? Is it because I have little boys????
Well, the boys need nourishment and I am the only one that can help them... Milk Man should be home soon for breakfast. He was fixing somthing in the barn this morning and i didnt have to milk. He is feeling much better, other than he has a bad cold.... I love playing his nurse.. *snicker* yes, I have the dress....

22 comments:

DJ said...

I LOVE those catalogs! *dreaming of spring*

The GI Joe gummies look like fun! I just wonder how many places my daughter would have them hidden away lol!

SUGAMAMA'S CAFE' said...

I know what you mean w/ the garden porn.. When I was younger my mum would get hers in the mail and for weeks just thumb thro it.. Then I didn't understand.. Now, Oh My, the pictures... The Zones.. All of those wonderful seeds... Oh My I have to go now......
~M~

COFFEE MAN said...

and you say IM DEMENTED ??? ROFLMAO

girl u are twisted , i love it and wouldnt have it any other way . the candlelady even said you must be feeling light headed after seeing the thong card

loved every minute of it

ps : im surprised the milkman let you pose for that card ? was it last vacat... no wait you were pregg then , musta been year before last !! lololololol

Mrs Mom said...

LOLOLOL Girl, you are really in a spot there, having to explain stuff like that card to Big Son!! HA~

Great package, and oooo GARDEN STUFF! hehehe

Hugs to you and all the kids, and Milk Man too. We love ya girl, and sure hope everyone is feeling 100% right quick~

Fidget said...

OMG that card! I had that very card I was going to send to someone and my kids found it look!

http://findingyourself.net/2005/02/11/thongs-for-the-beach-babes/

Fidget said...

ps: we just started out maters (beefsteak and rutgers) and our cukes. Hopefully Fall we'll have time for more

Living on the Spit said...

You absolutely crack me up! I just love visiting with you!

Big Hair Envy said...

Chocolate and Garden Porn in ONE POST? God, I love visiting you;)

Mikey said...

Gummy GI Joes? That is TOO COOL!!
Love it! Love the catalog, it's time to get ready to plant!

Vanessa said...

Thanks for the laugh! You brightened my day.

Now, why hasn't my "garden porn" arrived yet? I'm anxiously awaiting it so I can start planning. It always makes Spring seem much closer, and I am really tired of winter. Maybe it will come tomorrow.

Miss Annie Sew and Sew said...

You have certainly outdone yourself. I am totally waiting for my dose of corn, I mean porn. That is a four letter word. So is WORK. I love the smell of fresh dirt and worms. I planted some radishes in a pot and some patio tomatoes. SOmeone said they should produce inside. Sex in a pot. I didn't say that.

Mama Hen said...

You are HEE-lirious!!!!!!!!

Karen Deborah said...

CABIN FEVER you got it bad girl your are almost certifiable!
BWAHAHAHA

The W.O.W. factor said...

Oh...after my own heart! Chocolate!! Just got done devouring a Hershey's "female" bar before entering here! Needed my fix!
Then...the catalogs!! Mine have been arriving too, so I've been drooling over them locked in my room since I couldn't blog!
Hmmm..which is more addicting??
Hersheys?
Garden catalogs?
Blogging?
(your youngsters can keep all those soldier boys...I've never acquired a taste for gummies...but they haven't made chocolate ones yet I don't think)

Jody Blue said...

My husband has had his nose in ours for days! We love thier "gotta have it" sweet corn. Where do you buy your seeds?

Mrs Snow said...

Hey hun I LOVED the card..Definately tickled my sense of humour!..MMMM...chocolate...I can feel the kilo's attaching themselves to my thighs just by looking!*LOL*I know what you mean about the seeds..I have a well thumbed magazine and web page that I drool over...wishing Spring would get here quickly so I can get some dirt under my finger nails *sigh*.. Love, Light and Blessings Mrs Snow :)
PS..Thanks for dropping by :)

Greenmare said...

oh my gosh I was dreaming over my Gurney catalog this weekend too! I told Jim I'd just mark off everything I wanted to order, and he said it would be easier to mark off what I don't want to order!

cheesychick said...

Hear me out...You need to get off the farm. I think the smell of cow manure is affecting your brain! Nonetheless, you still made me laugh. Something I needed too!
P.S. What are you growing in those fields of yours? I need to get me some.
Judi

Willow Witch said...

I am humbled by the press...you are welcome.

LDF said...

Remind me to PAY ATTENTION when you give a "no liquids" warning! I put my tea down, but didn't swallow before I scrolled down ... needless to say, my desk and monitor received an unexpected cleaning. Then I enlarged that picture for our staff room! I do garden porn too, Heidi. I live in an apartment with no place to garden anymore, save for a few plant pots in my window sills, but I'm still a country gal at heart and look forward to the seed catalogues! Now I have to go find some chocolate. For some strange reason, I'm having a MAJOR chocolate craving ...

gtyyup said...

Ha!!! You're the Lefse lady AND work for NASS...too weird. I bookmarked your lefse post for next Christmas when I attempt to make lefse without my dear mother's guidance.

Then...come to find out, you do the same dang ag surveys I do...way too weird!!!

We just got back from training on ARMS III, so my first interviews are on Thursday...unless I get one for tomorrow after tonight's round of appointment making phone calls.

Your profile is what is private...go to your dashboard...edit profile...and check "share my profile". That should fix the problem I had finding you.

Later!!

Just Jane said...

So right there with you on the chocolate, reasons for giving the green men, and the thong thing.

Ha Ha scarbroughsropingforever.blospot.com