Big Son the prude...

I have to share this with you all because I laughed myself sick yesterday, only after I was mortified because of somthing Big Son said and did.. Big Son and I went to town together. He was home from school not feeling very well and I needed to go to town for some parts for the farm - we're in the field now so things are breaking left and right - anyway... We stopped at the store. I have to explain to you all that we are a loud family, yes THAT family. The ones who talk loud even for no reason, or the ones that yell down the aisle such things as - Do You Here Me? or the favorite - JUST WAIT TILL WE GET HOME!! yup, its us... BUT, in our defense I think it comes from working cattle, around loud machinery and distances from one another. Ya have to yell back and forth to be heard while working cattle or running machinery OR because you have only so much energy and walking 200 yards to tell someone something while your picking rock, is just to much work. Rocks stink in case anyone was wondering... now that I have explained that, here is my story.

It all takes place in the produce aisle of the local mega-store that I wont name.... I am ogling the fresh produce, because honestly people I don't get out much. Other than a parts run, I shop very little. Big Son takes off a few steps ahead of me in search of a couple of items that I needed while I stop to fondle the artichokes - they are neat little buggers arent they - a few seconds later I hear this "HEY MOM" He's about 25ft away from me and there are at least 6 other woman standing around groping the produce - of course we ALL look because, well we were all moms.....need I explain that? I doubt it.. the only other person there was a 'produce guy' and he was stocking the grapes. The produce guy keeps stocking his grapes as the women all turn to Big Son. Big Son stands holding 2 huge white onions and says the following "These are as big as Fritzie's nuts" (Fritzie is our Angus Bull)..... *crickets chirp* all the women turn to look at me and the 'grape guy' - turns to look at Big Son. I am SURE he had to see just HOW BIG they are. I wanted to crawl UNDER the tile but no go - I just smiled and shook my head at him like I completely understood, which I did but that's beside the point. Thank God at least 1 of the women must have been a farm/country wife/mom cuz she started to smile then laughed. The other woman gave me the - what do you teach your kids eye-roll and kept shopping. The grape guy, well - I think he must have been comparing the grapes to the onions, cuz he had a grin on his face too.. it's a guy thing.
After the onion incident, I don't think I will be able to shop for onions again without laughing my head off. I know every time I cut an onion I will think of Fritzie... What is so funny to me is not only what he said and did, but the fact that he is a PRUDE! I believe in being modest, no short shorts, no 'crop tops' or low rise jeans that your butt crack hangs out like Earl the plumber - but Big Son is worse. He wont go in the ladies underwear section with me, but he will talk about bull nuts. He hates bra commercials and says 'That is disrespectful, you never see men walking around in the shorts (underwear) and lets not discuss 'feminine' commercials - he leaves the room. He wont look at girls with cleavage hanging out, but likes a well dressed woman and will comment on how nice/pretty she looks.I know most of that is his age, but it's funny how one child can differ so much from the other. The other day Lispy was watching an old movie that we taped, it had commercials in it and one was a Hanes commercial with the lady in her bra, undies and a mans shirt on like a house coat. He said 'Mamma, does that yady (lady) have a baby?" I said I didnt know and asked why - He said "Cuz her thirt (shirt) is open an her tidder's (titter) is sticking out".... good grief.... I guess I must have done that at some point in time, but I sure dont remember it...

Anyway, enough body talk - I have an informational section too...

This is what a staff meeting looks like at the farm....

The CEO is on the right and the VP is on the left... I sleep with the VP in case you were wondering....

This is our bail wagon. We haul big round bales on it. The Milk Man made this himself, yes he IS good at things other than makeing beautiful little boys. He can weld a mean bead.... for those who dont weld, a bead is what you call weld after its cooled...

We can haul 17 bales that weigh 800-850lbs on this bugger. There are unloading chains on it and the running gear is heavy duty to support the weight. Its our own design and he did ALL of the work himself. It works great and saves lots of time. When it unloads you have to drive ahead slowly as the drive chains unload the bales - pretty neat huh?

Well, I have to get the boys up for breakfast so I better call this good!!