Sunday, September 28, 2008

In Memory of John Rongholt....

Sorry to be a downer today, but I have to get this off my chest. One year ago yesterday, September 27, 2007 we lost our 'pack' leader in a motorcycle accident. John was a great guy, who always had a smile or kind word for everyone, wether he knew you or not. He had a soft spot in his heart for his dog Moses, who is now with John in Heaven. Moses was the oldest black lab I have ever seen, yet he was healthy till John died. Moses lost his will to live and with that was no longer able to walk, eat or even move. He was put to rest a few days after John left us.

John was my brothers best friend and if you know my brother you would understand that he doesnt have close friends - except John. My brother is SO differant than the rest of our family, in a way he is the black sheep, yet we have never pushed him away - he is just a loner. John understood my brother and accepted his faults because they share so many of the same ones!! John did not have a lot to do with his family, he always said that they just never got along after his dad passed away. After Johns sister went to his work to pick up his things, she came to my mom and dads home to give them some pictures that he had at his desk. They were of our family, not his. On his computer he had a slideshow of pictures of OUR FAMILY - he called us his family - not his own. Its so sad that now his 'real' family is fighting over his property, belongings and his will.....that is why he had nothing to do with them - they are greedy, all but one sister. I so badly wanted to write a beautiful tribute to John, but I dont have the words today. My heart is breaking because I miss him so, yet I have hope that John reached out to Jesus in his last moments. When we call on the name of Jesus he will be there for us and will keep us for his own.
We all used to ride our Harleys together and John was just the natural 'leader' to us. He had ridden longer than the rest of us and he was just reliable. Never a speed demon, show off or ever felt the need to 'be better' than anyone. He was ALL of our family functions, birthdays, reunions, weddings - EVERYTHING. He was divorced and had no children, but was great to all the kids we have around. John was killed while riding home one evening with my brother. John was leading, as he always did and a deer ran out from the ditch and side swiped him. It threw him off of his bike and he hit his head. He died at the hospital a couple of hours later of massive head injurys. John didnt have a scratch on his hands, his face or anywhere on his body. His jeans were not torn his boots were not scuffed, his shirt showed no signs of distress. Yet, he left us. My brother was riding right behind John, saw the deer coming out of the ditch but was helpless to help John. My brother saw the hole thing and continues to do so when he closes his eyes at night. Prayers for him would be so appreciated, he loved John more than he loves us and that is ok - no they are not 'special' friends if you know what I mean - they were/are just BEST friends.

I miss John.....

13 comments:

Holly said...

I am so sorry for your loss.

Family is not always blood related as John showed you. You were fortunate indeed to have known such a fine fine man.

My deepest sympathy also to your brother, I am sure his is distraught.

Far Side of Fifty said...

Heidi, Memories of a year ago and even many years past are important to share. Your brother is still grieving as best friends don't come along very often in life. He will probably grieve forever. Far Guy's best friend died back in 1994..you never get over it, it is part of who you are and were. If you don't miss someone after they are gone..then they weren't very important in your life.
I will pray for your brother:)

Shanda said...

Heidi, I am so sorry for your loss and the sorrow in your heart today. Some things in life are just so unfair and hard. That was a beautiful trubute to him, You described him well and I have a understanding as to what kind of person he was. I will pray for your brother to have peace when he closes his eyes, that would be alot to go through. I hope he will be alright.
When you do get a get-a-way. You are invited to my house to use up all these beauty products left over from the salon. I wish you did live near, we would sit around and soak our feet while the kids played and we could chat. That would be so fun. Oh and our husbands could BBQ for us all and they could talk farming. Ha! It just a thought anyway.
Shanda

goatgirl said...

Oh Heidi I am so sorry. Your poor brother. Sometimes life is so hard.
My Hubby rides a motorcycle too and you never know if something is going to happen.
Smell Milk Duds head....that will make you feel better.

Coloradolady said...

Hello, I have been following your blog for a while. This was such a sad story. I think it is an outrage how families fight over money, possessions, etc. when some passes. It is such a shame.
I will keep your brother in my thoughts and prayers. I am sure he is still grieving.
And on a happier note, I really enjoy your blog.

Toni said...

Heidi -
Sorry for your loss, you pay excellent tribute to your friend. Not sure if you particiapte in such things but because I admire you - You've been tagged (see my blog) for 7 random things

Take a Deep Breath said...

I am so Sorry

Willow Witch said...

I am sorry for the loss of your friend. My husband and I have learned very painful lessons the last three years as we were cast from my husbands farm family, when they turned their backs we found we had so many wonderful friends that opened their lives to us with open arms and no judgements, they loved us for who we were/are.. I am sure John loved you all for just loving him for who he was with no expectations or strings. As Harley riders ourselves we have lost friends on bikes and you think about them everytime you put on your helmet and feel the wind on your face. We lost a friend leaving our house on a 4 wheeler and on Oct 1st it will be three years, Im not sure how I will face that day this year... I guess I will find out on Wed. Your brother is lucky that you give him his space and love him anyway. Not every family is so generous.

Jen said...

That was a very nice tribute. I am truly sorry for your loss. You, your brother, and the rest of your family are in my prayers.

Mrs Mom said...

Heidi, you brought John to life with your words. As long as you ALL keep the memory of John in your hearts, and can remember all the fun and good times, he will stay there with you always. That goes for your brother too. He has to remember the good times.

Remember Dear Lady, everything happens for a reason. And when it is time, it is time, and we are called home. That does not mean he is not with you- he is just there in a different way, keeping an eye on you all.

Keep him alive in your hearts Heidi, and tell that brother of yours to do the same.

Hugs

Train Wreck said...

Oh My dear friend, what a sad story. I am sorry for your loss! Holly is right, "Family is not always blood" I hope time eases your pain, and keeps your memories fresh.

Rechelle said...

Hey Heidi - I'll be thinking about you and your brother - take care.

haffnewie said...

What a sad story. I just happened along on your blog and read this. I am so sorry for your loss. I will keep your family and your brother in my prayers.